Today coming to work, I saw one of those only in New York scenes. It was a rat who had passed out after choking on a pretzel.

You've got to be careful smoking weed. It causes memory loss. And also, it causes memory loss.

I believe I have voted for both Democrats and Republicans. Am I either one? Absolutely not. Ladies and gentlemen, I am an American.

George W. said he doesn't watch television. And, of course, well - the reason for that is the Clintons stole the White House satellite system.

A lot of issues were on the ballots. In New York City there was Proposition 14. That would put a ceiling on the number of late-night talk shows. And California passed Proposition 21. That would change guacamole officially to guac.

Former President Bush, to celebrate his 80th birthday, jumped out of an airplane. And if you've seen the polls, you know he's not the only Bush in freefall.

Over the weekend, John Kerry - the big John Kerry juggernaut moves on - he won primaries in Washington D.C., Nevada and, I think, Canada. And he's so confident that he's started nailing that intern again.