The Democrats were crushed in the midterm elections. The Republican juggernaut pounded the Democrats, and the pundits say they will not really know what happened to the Democrats until they find the black box.

You probably heard about the big prisoner swap with Cuba. A man who has been incarcerated in Havana for five years is back home in the United States. And we sent them some prisoners. The deal still has to be approved by President Obama and Bud Selig.

All comedians are preoccupied with one thing and with one thing only-themmm-selllves. It's a horrible lot in life.

This will be Michelle Obama's last opportunity to try to get me to eat kale.

The oil spill is getting bad. There is so much oil and tar now in the Gulf of Mexico, Cubans can now walk to Miami.

Tomorrow is our final show. That is unless it rains, and then there will be a rain delay. We'll probably make it up in a doubleheader around Labor Day.

President Obama's trying to work out a nuclear deal with Iran, and the Republicans are steamed. They got together and sent Iran a letter about the nuclear deal. They said if this doesn't work, by God, they're going to send Seth Rogen and James Franco.