President Obama went to India, South Korea, then Japan. He's going to keep travelling until he finds his birth certificate.

Humans are the only animal who can have sex over the phone.

President Bush is going to establish elections there in Iraq. He's going to rebuild the infrastructure. He's going to create jobs. He said if it works there, he'll try it here.

Let's have some wine, go upstairs, and look at my money.

At the White House, they caught another fence jumper earlier today. It was Obama trying to get out.

Do you remember the good ol' days when Congress was only unsafe if you were an intern.

In just a few minutes, my son will have completed his first trip around the sun.