Motivation is a lotta crap.

Johnny Carson is a comedian who is seen every night in millions of bedrooms all over America...and that's why his last wife left him.

Everybody makes mistakes; look at Hitler.

When your opponent's sittin' there holdin' all the aces, there's only one thing to do: kick over the table.

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show business. Hard work, perseverance, and discipline: all the things you need...when you have no talent.

The thing I notice first about a woman is her walk. A beautiful woman is like a race horse-slim, sleek and with a beautiful carriage.

I know it's the gentlemanly thing to let the wife file. But, then, everybody knows I'm no gentleman.