When those closest to us respond to events differently than we do, when they seem to see the same scene as part of a different play, when they say things that we could not imagine saying in the same circumstances, the ground on which we stand seems to tremble and our footing is suddenly unsure.

For most women, the language of conversation is primarily a language of rapport: a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships.

Life is a matter of dealing with other people, in little matters and cataclysmic ones, and that means a series of conversations.

[T]he seeds of [the Argument Culture] can be found our classrooms, where a teacher will introduce an article or an idea . . . setting up debates where people learn not to listen to each other because they're so busy trying to win the debate.

We all know we are unique individuals, but we tend to see others as representatives of groups.

Saying that men talk about baseball in order to avoid talking about their feelings is the same as saying that women talk about their feelings in order to avoid talking about baseball.

We tend to look through language and not realize how much power language has