In dialogue, there is opposition, yes, but no head-on collision. Smashing heads does not open minds.
Deborah TannenCommunication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence
Deborah TannenTo say that a person feels listened to means a lot more than just their ideas get heard. It's a sign of respect. It makes people feel valued.
Deborah Tannen[T]he seeds of [the Argument Culture] can be found our classrooms, where a teacher will introduce an article or an idea . . . setting up debates where people learn not to listen to each other because they're so busy trying to win the debate.
Deborah Tannen