The quarterback's spending so much time behind the center that he may jeopardize his right to lead a Boy Scout troop.
Dennis MillerI'm extremely moved by the loving, caring relationship the President always seems to have with his imaginary son.
Dennis MillerLaughter is one of the great beacons in life because we don't refract it by gunning it through our intellectual prism. What makes us laugh is a mystery - an involuntary response.
Dennis MillerI used to be sceptic, but not anymore, because now I am positive that I'm getting screwed.
Dennis MillerIf some unemployed punk in New Jersey, can get a cassette to make love to Elle McPherson for $19.95, this virtual reality stuff is going to make crack look like Sanka.
Dennis MillerLook, we're Americans: optimistic, addicted to the quick fix, constantly on the hunt for the new and exotic. It's much easier for us to accept a guy with a big white beard hawking his own custom blend of saw palmetto and squirrel dandruff that it is to hear a real doctor telling us to lay off the big macs, and get off our fat asses and take a walk every decade or so.
Dennis Miller