Now let me get this straight. Bush is anti-abortion, but pro-death penalty. I guess it's all in the timing, huh?
Dennis MillerParenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation's highways.
Dennis MillerIt's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time; yet nothing terrifies us more than the thought of eternity.
Dennis MillerNow I don't have anything against Mexican people, but for God's sakes, sign the gust book on the way in.
Dennis MillerIn regards to Oral Roberts' claim that God told him that he would die unless he received $20 million by March, God's lawyers have stated that their client has not spoken with Roberts for several years. Off the record, God has stated that 'if I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago.
Dennis Miller