The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they'd word something or how they'd inflect it.

I'm the only talk show host, I think, if there's such a category in, what's called, the book of records, to have a guest die while we were taping the show, yeah.

My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.

History is not reassuring on the subject of the longevity of seemingly lasting great nations, is it?

Electronic devices dislike me. There is never a day when something isn't ailing.

I guess the best advice I ever got or anyone could get for doing a talk show, though it has not been easy very often, was from Jack Paar, who said, 'Kid, don't make it an interview. Interviews have clipboards, and you're like David Frost. Make it a conversation.'

Music bypasses the brain and goes straight to the heart. I wish my life had more of it.