The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they'd word something or how they'd inflect it.

I would not ever try to be a show intellectual, which I was accused of doing a while on ABC. I thought you were supposed to read the guests' books.

The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they'd word something or how they'd inflect it.

There are online forms you can fill out to send to your lawmakers, demanding that nothing - nothing at all or in any way - be done about any guns whatever, anywhere.

I don't think anyone ever gets over the surprise of how differently one audience's reaction is from another.

I don't see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty - and evaporating quickly.

Great humorists are great insulters.