I'm sure I've all but lost friends by maintaining that, despite their love for it, I always saw Stanley Kramer's 'It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World' as more of an exercise in anti-comedy than humor.

My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.

I'll be happy if I can just stay out of Nebraska.

Therapists need to give a depressed patient support and direction.

A grown man, weeping, is a tough thing to see.

By the time I was in the fourth grade, I sounded exactly like my father on the phone.

A conversation does not have to be scintillating in order to be memorable. I once met a president of the United States, and his second sentence to me was about knees.