Hell, do I remember the first joke? I was never a jokester.

I can sit all day in a comfortable chair and watch ball games, but I don't need a blanket.

My whole act is off the top of my head.

My main success was an attitude. Always an attitude.

Frank Sinatra enjoyed my humor, so I could say almost anything to him. I mean, within reason.

Famous people are deceptive. Deep down, they're just regular people. Like Larry King. We've been friends for forty years. He's one of the few guys I know who's really famous. One minute he's talking to the president on his cell phone, and then the next minute he's saying to me, Do you think we ought to give the waiter another dollar?

To this day, to this very day, except for television, I've never had a writer. Anything I've ever done on the stage, happened on the stage and I developed it from there. It started doing impressions and jokes - which I did very poorly. To this day I can't tell a joke. That sounds nuts, but it's true. I exaggerate it and it becomes a joke. Everything I've ever done I've done out on the stage and it became a performance over many many years.