Asians are nice people, but they burn a lot of shirts.

I don't really tell a joke, I react to situations. The whole thing is just looking at somebody and showing all our weaknesses and exaggerating them, and that's how it becomes funny.

I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.

Alan King, a comedian I adored, was considered society, and I was considered the Jewish kid from the neighborhood.

It takes many years to be a great comedian.

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

To this day, to this very day, except for television, I've never had a writer. Anything I've ever done on the stage, happened on the stage and I developed it from there. It started doing impressions and jokes - which I did very poorly. To this day I can't tell a joke. That sounds nuts, but it's true. I exaggerate it and it becomes a joke. Everything I've ever done I've done out on the stage and it became a performance over many many years.