My father wasn't much for show business. He was an insurance man - very well-liked, very warm. He had a lot of friends.

Everything I do on stage, I made up in saloons. I started doing it in front of people, and that became my performance. I never had writers.

I was with George Washington at Valley Forge, sitting around before an attack... gimme a break. That's over 70 years ago already.

I've never been able to tell jokes. In the beginning of my career I did impressions and jokes like any other comedian, but I was never very successful because I did it poorly. So I started to talk to the audience and started talking about the atmosphere around me and started to become angry, not in a mean-spirited way, but in a fun way - and my attitude developed from there.

That I walk around calling people 'dummy' and 'hockey puck'. I do have a different life apart from being sarcastic on stage. I might kibitz around with my friends, but I'm nothing like the person who does stand up. Nothing like that.

The thing I love about Vegas is that it's a melting pot. It's like working Ellis Island.

Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all that.