Never kiss in public, but at home I am affectionate.

You used to have to beg and be the busboy to do standup. I got on Community because people saw my videos on YouTube, which were free.

May your dreams be sweet and your nightmares be spooky-monster-scary and not grandma-died-scary.

There are some rappers out there that I listen to, that I'm like: "You are really good but you could be like the Michael Jordan of rap if you applied yourself." There's a lot of people who are better at basketball than Michael Jordan, but Michael Jordan just wanted to be Michael Jordan, more.

I'm probably going to get in trouble for this but 'American Dad' is one of my favourite shows. It gets very dark in places but the jokes are there.

Taking a call girl to an STD fair... there's a joke here.

Girls are supposed to dance. That's why god gave them parts that jiggle.