Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.

If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.

It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.

Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.

Four things I am wiser to know: Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe.

My first love was Cinderella, but she ran off with another man.

Innocence is a desirable thing, a dainty thing, an appealing thing, in its place; but carried too far, it is merely ridiculous.