You say you hate children and people always say the same thing; it would be different if it was your own child. Well what if it wasn't?

I'm not the one-take wonder that a lot people think I am.

I love playing in the UK because there are some topics that you just can't talk about in the States without getting run out of town. So let me just say this: Louis C. K.'s new show sucks.

Right at the end of the big wall of vibrators, $29.95, big rubber fist. Thirty bucks! Just in time for mothers day.

There's a fine line between being a sicko and an adventurous spirit.

I do good things in my life, too. It's just that none of them are funny.

I immediately split the crowd. I thought about coming on every night and shouting, 'Gay pride, white power!' just to confuse people.