"Close your mouth when you chew." That was my mother's big one.Why do people eat lunch together? I want to eat by myself. Chewing is one of the most revolting things to me. Wind makes me unnerved, too.

Mutations are exciting. They try to fix 'em when they come out. Did you see the two-headed baby they killed last month when they tried to cut it apart? That was hilarious!

I drank, smoked and did drugs to get where I'm at.

I was 23 with a mullet doing lots of jerk-off material.I can't look at the old tapes now.

We must not suppose that, because a man is a rational animal, he will, therefore, always act rationally; or, because he has such or such a predominant passion, that he will act invariably and consequentially in pursuit of it. No, we are complicated machines; and though we have one main spring that gives motion to the whole, we have an infinity of little wheels, which, in their turns, retard, precipitate, and sometime stop that motion.

I'd get demolitions experts to rig mother to implode like a skyscraper.

I've had six or eight hookers in my life. I never woke up the next day thinking man I'm glad I got a hooker last night.