"Close your mouth when you chew." That was my mother's big one.Why do people eat lunch together? I want to eat by myself. Chewing is one of the most revolting things to me. Wind makes me unnerved, too.

People always try to palm me weed when I'm always talking about how I don't smoke weed. But they always try to ... and when they stop offering me weed, then I'm going to feel kind of out of touch, like: "What did I do wrong that you won't offer me drugs that I don't do?" Because I'll trade those drugs out for drugs that I do do.

The whole institution of marriage itself really has no place in a progressive society.

I love conspiracy theories. I used to just live on it. You know it's all hype and garbage, but you're still really paranoid afterwards. It's fun entertainment.

Artists who say that they're artists: usually people who need a job.

There should be no such thing as a vice law. Every vice is only a bad habit, and the punishment is inherent in the act.

He's my usual type of fan... a school shooter who didn't have bullets and now he's all awkward and alone.