Before modern medicine, would pussies just generally rot up inside you and fall out of you like spoiled oysters on the sidewalk?

Do you ever wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and think, something's not accurate?

Steal my stuff off the internet wherever you can and don't apologize. Buy the CDs and DVDs from my site and feel free to burn 'em and share 'em. Then come to the show.

We must not suppose that, because a man is a rational animal, he will, therefore, always act rationally; or, because he has such or such a predominant passion, that he will act invariably and consequentially in pursuit of it. No, we are complicated machines; and though we have one main spring that gives motion to the whole, we have an infinity of little wheels, which, in their turns, retard, precipitate, and sometime stop that motion.

Invent new drugs, that's what you should be doing... fight to get new weirder ones... and weirder establishments to do them in.

Everything that is going to kill you is extremely appetizing.

It was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass raping at airport security.