If you need a baby that bad, go down to the pound and get one. Not even a baby - go get an old man. There's unwanted people of all ages, pre-made and waiting for you.
Doug StanhopeIt was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass raping at airport security.
Doug StanhopeThe whole institution of marriage itself really has no place in a progressive society.
Doug StanhopeThe reputation of generosity is to be purchased pretty cheap; it does not depend so much upon a man's general expense, as it does upon his giving handsomely where it is proper to give at all. A man, for instance, who should give a servant four shillings, would pass for covetous, while he who gave him a crown, would be reckoned generous; so that the difference of those two opposite characters, turns upon one shilling.
Doug Stanhope