He learned to communicate with birds and discovered their conversation was fantastically boring. It was all to do with windspeed, wingspans, power-to-weight ratios and a fair bit about berries.

I am rarely happier than when spending entire day programming my computer to perform automatically a task that it would otherwise take me a good ten seconds to do by hand.

The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.

I'm so great even I get tongue-tied talking to myself.

This planet has — or rather had — a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time.

Time affords us the ability to blame past errors on others while whole heartedly pronouncing our futures successes.

The books people are writing today, they're too long. You get a little bit of plot, and then pages and pages of Creative Writing. They teach classes in how to do this. They should teach classes in how to stop!