Somewhere in there the grace of a ballet dancer joins with the strength of an SAS squaddie, the dignity of an ancient kind, the nerve of a bomb disposal officer.

You need dictatorships and poverty to produce great footballers.

I'll have you know that I am not a failed Third Division footballer. I am a failed Second Division footballer.

That is NOT the arse of a £7million player!

If ever a player was out of his class that night it was me.

They get to the quarter-finals, Bill, I'll show up with a dress on

Well, I don't like to make outlandish statements. Not all the time. But Wimbledon would have beaten them 10-0.