Someone's killed 100,000 people. We're almost going, "Well done! You killed 100,000 people? You must get up very early in the morning! I can't even get down the gym. Your diary must look odd: 'Get up in the morning, death, death, death, death, death, death, death - lunch - death, death, death - afternoon tea - death, death, death - quick shower ...' "

I wanted to be less well-known in comedy.

Cos people think I'm on drugs and I'm not. I'm really quite... Just a bit of coffee. When I take drugs I start going, Oh, would you like insurance?

If you get too well-known, you can never be a comedian's comedian, it just won't sit well. But I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that label.

When I watched Braveheart I was in tears and I was rooting for the Scottish people

Well, if you don't have a flag, then you can't have a country. Those are the rules... that I just made up!

The Pope is guarded by the Swiss guard who stand proudly in pajamas and silly hats.