Someone's killed 100,000 people. We're almost going, "Well done! You killed 100,000 people? You must get up very early in the morning! I can't even get down the gym. Your diary must look odd: 'Get up in the morning, death, death, death, death, death, death, death - lunch - death, death, death - afternoon tea - death, death, death - quick shower ...' "

My Gran said put a thimble on your finger and it helps you in case you slip with the needle and it goes up, into the brain, and death.

I like my coffee hot and strong. Like I like my women: hot and strong...with a spoon in them.

Never put a sock in a toaster.

But the Dutch speak four languages and smoke marijuana!

San Francisco! City of dreaming spires, people live here... Golden Gate Bridge, ahh the Romans came here.

You have no control over your cat! You can't say to your cat, "Cat, heel! Stay! Wait! Lie down! Roll over!" 'Cause the cat's just gonna be sitting there going, "Interesting words ... have you finished?" While you're shouting all this to your cat, your dog's next to you, going ... [mimes obeying all commands] "What the hell are you doing? I'm talking to the cat!" "Oh, I'm sorry!"