Holidays were invented so single women could overeat without feeling guilty.

It's better to oversleep and miss the boat than get up early and sink.

Laughter is just like champagne -- only without the headache afterwards.

I'm not lazy. I'm just really gifted, only instead of being good at music or math I'm good at sleeping late.

A massage is just like a movie, really relaxing and a total escape, except in a massage you're the star. And you don't miss anything by falling asleep!

For a single girl in London, luck isn't always a glass slipper that fits. Sometimes luck is a splash of mud from a passing bus.

I'm not particularly keen on pity. Pity takes something away from grief. People think they're sharing it, but really they're just taking some. I prefer to keep my grief intact.