I always worry when someone's a good golfer. It's like you shouldn't have time to be good at anything. You should just be a politician and you shouldn't have time to practice golf.
Ellen DeGeneresWe all feel like idiots at one time or another. Even if we feel we're cool 98 percent of the time, that 2-percent doofus is poised to take over our bodies without any warning.
Ellen DeGeneresI don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'
Ellen DeGeneres