When you look like your passport photo, it's time to go home.

There are few things in this world more satisfying than having your son teach you how to play tennis, unless it is having a semi-truck run over your foot.

Before we sent kids to computer camps and told them they were having a good time, there was imagination among the human species.

If I had my life to live over I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?

Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.

Any mother with half a skull knows that when Daddy's little boy becomes Mommy's little boy, the kid is so wet he's treading water.