Explain to me how he [her son] can ride a bicycle, run, play ball, set up a camp, swing, fight a war, swim and race for eight hours ... and has to be driven to the garbage can.

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.

You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren't dying. They're merging into big conglomerates.

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.

Let me put it this way. According to my girth, I should be a ninety-foot redwood.

The age of your children is a key factor in how quickly you are served in a restaurant. We once had a waiter in Canada who said, "Could I get you your check?" and we answered, "How about the menu first?"

Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.