If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.

I'm real ambivalent about [working mothers]. Those of use who have been in the women's movement for a long time know that we've talked a good game of "go out and fulfill your dreams" and "be everything you were meant to be." But by the same token, we want daughters-in-law who are going to stay home and raise our grandchildren.

There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M.

Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can't see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.

House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.

Babies on television never spit up on the Ultrasuede.

Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.