It's frightening to wake up one morning and discover that while you were asleep you went out of style.

What does it profit a 78-year-old woman to sit around the pool in a bikini if she cannot feed herself?

Housework, if you do it right, will kill you.

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.

My son did not show signs of a money deficiency until he opened his small fist in the nursery and found it was empty.

To say, "Well, I write when I really get into it" is a bunch of bull. Put the paper in the typewriter, stare at it a long time, get snowblindness if you have to, but write something.

The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar.