Success is outliving your failures

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

Most mothers entering the labor market outside the home are naive. They stagger home each evening, holding mail in their teeth, the cleaning over their arm, a lamb chop defrosting under each armpit, balancing two gallons of frozen milk between their knees, and expect one of the kids to get the door.

When you're lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.

Bombeck's Rug Rule: an ugly carpet will last for ever.

Housework can kill you if done right.

Let us hope manufacturers can come up with a diaper that is environmentally sound. To go back to cloth would send us back to the day when breathing and raising a baby at the same time were incompatible.