Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.

People elect the President for reasons that have nothing to do with his ability to be president.

Now people need special costumes to ride bicycles. I mean, a helmet, what, are you an astronaut??

Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.

The great thing about New Jersey is that it's close to New York.

Being offended is a natural consequence of leaving the house.

Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don't have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.