I believe in talking behind peoples' backs. That way, they hear it more than once.

It would also have been helpful to have gone to a Catholic grammar school. The only people who know grammar are those people who went to Catholic grammar school. Those nuns beat it into them.

If you removed all of the homosexuals and homosexual influence from what is generally regarded as American culture, you would pretty much be left with Let's Make a Deal.

In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.

There is nothing more mine than my writing, nothing I'm more proprietary about.

The only appropriate response to the question, 'Can I be frank?' is, 'Yes, if I can be Barbara.

Think before you speak. Read before you think.