[On not reading newspapers:] If something important happens, your mother calls you.

The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.

This idea that people have to love and understand each other is absurd. It's not human nature.

New York was always more expensive than the other places, even when it was going bankrupt. In other words, in 1971, New York was expensive for someone with no money. For anyone.

Favorite animal: steak.

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.

Life is so absurd now that it is almost impossible to be a satirist in this era.