I love sleep because it is both pleasant and safe to use. Pleasant because one is in the best possible company and safe because sleep is the consummate protection against the unseemliness that is the invariable consequence of being awake. What you don't know won't hurt you. Sleep is death without the responsibility.

I've never seen the Kardashians; I'm not sure who they are. But I know a lot about them because it's impossible not to.

Smoking is, as far as I'm concerned, the entire point of being an adult.

Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one.

I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.

I believe in talking behind peoples' backs. That way, they hear it more than once.

I wouldn't say that I dislike the young. I'm simply not a fan of naïveté.