That I am totally devoid of sympathy for, or interest in, the world of groups is directly attributable to the fact that my two greatest needs and desires - smoking cigarettes and plotting revenge - are basically solitary pursuits.

The Italians are the most civilized people. And they're very warm. Basically, they're Jews with great architecture.

All of television's appalling, but this is hardly a new statement.

Contrary to what many of you may imagine, a career in letters is not without its drawbacks - chief among them the unpleasant fact that one is frequently called upon to sit down and write.

I love sleep because it is both pleasant and safe to use.

I had to go on TV with the president of the Catholic League, which is not an official organization at all, just a lot of Catholics, or maybe it's just this guy. He demanded to de-fund art completely and argued that taxpayers should not pay for it. I said people who represent the Catholic Church shouldn't talk about taxes.

If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don't teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.