Guy on the plane I'm on has a text alert that sounds like a gunshot... And he isn't putting it on vibrate.

It's a simple and an effective way of getting everyone on the same page, prepared and paying attention to the gag. People just get into that frame of mind of you doing impressions. It can take a minute or two for an audience to catch on when you aren't doing one.

I love John Madden, because he makes me feel smart.

Speaking of Quarterback nicknames, you hear they're calling Jay Cutler 50 cent? Because you only get two quarters out of him.

Here's a guy that when he puts his contacts in, he can see better.

I chose Journalism by default. I always loved TV, and I had no idea what else to do, so I studied what interested me.

I didn't apply to different schools. I wasn't really sure what I was going to do.