Elections are won by men and women chiefly because most people vote against somebody rather than for somebody.

If a man keeps his trap shut, the world will beat a path to his door.

When the political columnists say 'Every thinking man' they mean themselves, and when candidates appeal to 'Every intelligent voter' they mean everybody who is going to vote for them

To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.

Nobody can write such ironic things unless he has a deep sense of injustice-injustice to those members of the race who are victims of the stupid, the pretentious and the hypocritical.

Ninety-two percent of the stuff told you in confidence you couldn't get anyone else to listen to.

There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.