Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better.

Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.