It's because you alienate half the room talking about sports. Half the crowd will be against you no matter what you say.

As far as "uncut" I think we all know that you guys cut up the special. Originally it was going to be 2 hours plus and it got chopped down so I said "we can't use those words because it's not going to represent me right".

I think when we stop putting labels and start worrying more about the performance, that's when you're able to cross over and make yourself a household name and go everywhere.

I eat a lot of junk food, because that's what's usually available at 1:00am when I'm all done working.

I still come out to music that's in Spanish. There's no denying who I am, but I've just made it to where my performance is so anybody can understand it - whether you're 10 years old or 80 years old.

If i wouldn't have done comedy, I would have been a teacher. I was really good when I took an exploratory teaching class in high school, at getting kids' attention, and delivering lesson plans. Though my principal even told me that this was what I was meant to do. And that being a big-mouth comedian was a waste of time.

I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.