No matter what time of year I come here, people always say the same thing: Its not usually like this.

English is the perfect language for preachers because it allows you to talk until you think of what to say.

We thank you [the soldiers recently returned from the middle east] for your service.

In the end, all solutions are temporary.

I like to sing and it's just really fun to sing, and I don't get too much. And at my house I'm not allowed to because, you know, your children can't stand it when you sing at home.

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor