What I need is an Urban Thesaurus. I know what money is what I need is 600 different ways to say it.

I always wanted to make strangers and friends and family laugh. I was over ten years younger than my brothers. It was hard to get attention without some kind of gimmick, like athletic stardom or being funny.

Maybe a silver lining to growing old is being able to watch Usual Suspects for the first time, again.

If you are 26 years old and you're waking up under Star Wars sheets... the Force is not with you.

I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together to watch stand-up comedy.

Every cookie is a sugar cookie. A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

Rich people are just like us though they now eat their meals off square shaped plates.