I think everything is fair game to a certain extent.

I was born when my dad was 50... It's weird growing up with a dad that much older than you. We'd go to the movies, we're both getting discounts.

The definition of the word nerd has changed. It's now any attractive person with a hobby. The loneliness component is no longer included.

My brother is a tax guy, and the way I look at it, it's like he's spending his life saving money for rich people. So I think making strangers laugh, at least having a creative component to your profession, is more manageable for me. I can live with that a lot easier.

It's a real valley when I talk about veal. And calf roping. People were sensitive about calf roping. Which I think is quite funny.

I hate nickels; they're quarter impersonators.

If you try to pop the unpopped kernels in the microwave, you go back in time.