I think everything is fair game to a certain extent.

What I need is an Urban Thesaurus. I know what money is what I need is 600 different ways to say it.

Maybe a silver lining to growing old is being able to watch Usual Suspects for the first time, again.

I think everything is fair game to a certain extent.

For the first few years I wrote jokes and performed them word for word and then wrote tags for them and did that word for word and that worked pretty well. Now, I do almost all of my writing on stage and then record and listen for any new things and then I write those down.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was the quarter from behind the ear gag. He would never put the time in.

The other thing is that I'm a pretty moody guy, but no one really wants to see a normal-looking guy complain about things or talk about being unhappy. That's hard. Most people are like, 'Well, you have all your hair and you're tall, so why are you unhappy?' That can be limiting.