When you're gay every party is a bad sweater party.

I was born when my dad was 50... It's weird growing up with a dad that much older than you. We'd go to the movies, we're both getting discounts.

I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together to watch stand-up comedy.

Just saw an orthodox Jewish kid do 3 pull-ups on the scaffolding. Shattering the previous record.

I really think I'm at the top of my game right now, and I have the tools that I've learned over the years, so I feel really good about what I'm doing onstage now.

When you're gay every party is a bad sweater party.

I just can't dance like no ones watching. I tried but it's futile.