Don't go back over your life with a red pen.

There are certain jokes that indicate how mainstream a comic is. If you're talking about how the side effects of drugs that they advertise on TV are worse than the actual illness they're supposed to prevent, that's like the hackiest joke out there now. If you're still doing that joke, that usually is an indicator of being mainstream, in a bad way.

Ever drive by one of those things on the highway which tells you how fast you're going? I don't even pay attention to them anymore because I found a similar gadget in my dashboard... Some people slow down at those things... I don't slow down. I speed up and set the high score.

I've always wanted to do more significant stuff. I think of myself as well-informed, but the hardest thing to do is talk about politics and current events and be funny and not just preachy.

Don't go back over your life with a red pen.

I just always wonder if I'm too obsessive about subjects. I try to avoid that.

Without my family, I'd be something.