Education can get you the only thing that really matters in today's world--an assigned parking space.

My granddaughter and I are inseparable. She keeps me wrapped around her little finger.

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it.

I like to do nice things for my grandchildren - like buy them those toys I've always wanted to play with.

I went to school with a kid who was so smart, the only time he got an answer wrong, they had to go back and change the question.

I don't intentionally spoil my grandkids. It's just that correcting them often takes more energy than I have left.

Leisure: A fancy word for people who don't want to admit they're bored.