Me and a mate picked up two darling birds and they took us back to their flat. I went into the bedroom with my bird and she started getting undressed. I was that drunk I was standing there wondering how to get undressed without letting go of the award. I went to sit on the bed, missed it by four feet and ended up lying on the floor. I remember the bird looking down at me, and saying, ‘Some player of the year.’ Then I fell asleep. I woke up still clutching my award and staggered out of the flat. I hadn’t a bloody clue where I was.

If I had to choose between dribbling past 5 players and scoring from 40 yards at Anfield or shagging miss world, it'd be a hard choice. Thankfully, i've done both

That's what children do - throw food. That's not fighting. We were real men. We'd have chinned them.

I want to be remembered for my football and the pleasure I gave people.

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life.

I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.

I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World.