This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.

In what other business can a guy my age drink martinis, smoke cigars and sing? I think all people who retire ought to go into show business. I've been retired all my life.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.'

Dress simply. If you wear a dinner jacket, don't wear anything else on it ... like lunch or dinner.

I don't believe in dying. It's been done. I'm working on a new exit. Besides, I can't die now - I'm booked.

Much later in life, though, Gracie made a major contribution to the opera world. She stayed out of it.