This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.

Let me get one thing straight; I'm not an authority on sex, I'm more of a fan. I think sex is nice; no family should be without it. Of course, there are other things that are just as important as sex, like uh . . . like uh . . . like . . . uh . . . well, I'll think of it later.

A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night.

Yale men do not like to be told anything by people who didn't go to Yale. The closest I came to Yale was once I had one of their padlocks.

Young. Old. Just words. Inside we feel like our shoe size.

I don't worry about getting old. I'm old already. Only young people worry about getting old.

I'd say that about 82 percent of what I write is bad, but don't go by me; I'm as bad a judge as I am a writer. Look, if it were all good, you'd be paying twice as much for this book.