When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
George CarlinInstead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.
George CarlinWhat I hated most was seeing those priests and brothers getting so much pleasure out of inflicting pain. I wondered what was wrong with them.
George CarlinHonesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
George CarlinI think there's a little more attention to human needs than to property rights. But I don't think much of political activism. It's so shortsighted. Most people are interested in their own personal comfort. I've said that about environmentalists. I think they care about bike paths and places to park their Volvos, not the planet as an abstraction.
George Carlin