Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.
Don't give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.
Children are not our future, and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic. Children can't be our future, because by the time the future arrives, they won't be children anymore, so blow me!
My grandfather, mother and father were gifted verbally, and my mother passed that along to me. She always made sure I was conscious of language and words.