The worst thing about e-mail is that you canโt interrupt the other person. You have to read the whole thing and then e-mail them back, pointing out all their mistakes and faulty assumptions. Itโs frustrating and itโs time-consuming. God bless phone calls.
George CarlinIf you've got a cat and a leg, you've got a happy cat. If you've got a cat and two legs, you've got a party.
George CarlinHow come when it's us, it's an abortion, and when it's a chicken, it's an omelette? Are we so much better than chickens all of a sudden? When did this happen; that we passed chickens in goodness? Name six ways we're better than chickens. See, nobody can do it! You know why? 'Cause chickens are decent people.
George CarlinI think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.
George CarlinI don't think drugs are a problem; I think they're a symptom. As long as Americans are empty, spiritually, emotionally, morally empty, they will need things like the drugs they choose to use. Mankind has wanted to change the way it felt from the beginning anyway. In this country there are even more reasons to want to feel different, to want to feel better, because this is such a neon sewer. This is such a degrading culture. It forces you to play Beethoven to your child in the uterus so that he will get into a better school and a better job and make more money so he can take care of you.
George Carlin