I don't have to edit myself. I get to be me, warts and all, and that's ultimately what people want, and to trust each other implicitly.

A man would rather be trampled by elephants on fire than tell you he's just not that into you.

Part of being a comedian is that it's your job to look at life and regurgitate it in a funny way, to point out its absurdities.

..he may love you, he may miss you, but ultimately he's just not that into you.

For me, a breakup changed my entire life. I was a mess. I really got rocked, and I ended up turning it into a positive thing.

Don't waste the pretty

If he's not calling you, it's because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn't follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he's okay with disappointing you.